Is not looking to commit to you

Got this list in my email today from a fan of the show who wanted me to verify if I think they are correct for her...I do.

He has a girlfriend or is married

He’s recently separated

Or he’s divorced but clinging to the fact that he’s been divorced to avoid committing

He’s in a long distance relationship. With someone else. Or you’re in one with him and he has no desire to get closer.

He’s very reliant on text messages, instant messaging and email for the majority of his contact.  This shows he is trying to keep you distant, and put things on "his time"

Click take the jump to keep reading.

What?!

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Meet Derick. He is 35, owns his own airplane company, makes crap loads of cash. He is not real, but no one has to know that. He will flirt with you on your facebook wall to make your friends jealous and husband/bf think he might have some competition.

ADD HIM NOW - Just don't forget who he really is.

Facebook.com/MileHighD

"He wants to hug you with his mouth"

Bacon, Cheese and Depression sandwiched between two slabs of fried chicken! 

540 calories, 32 grams of fat and 1380 milligrams of sodium

I will eat 15 of these today.

Which is which?

If you have not already started giving loser dudes the reject hotline number, here yah go

501-208-UGLY (8459)

You can also now forward any LAME texts you get from men to this number as well.  We will create a Text Hall of Lame gallery soon.

In many stages of naked.

Did I see a Spice Girl in this?

STOP WHISPERING!!! - Is it against vampire/wolf code to say something in a normal tone of voice!?! BTW, Edward looks like one of those kids who spends all day trying to bum smokes off you outside the mall while they wait for their mom to pick them up.

Blowhan said the second baby girl was modeled after her because the one-word name “Lindsay” was identified with her.

She wants $100 Million (That's a lot of vodka)

I think I stole this twice, once from Eric who I think stole it from Mo

Either way, this is a pic of Justin Bieber and his girlfriend who is not you.  Consider your life shattered.

Who wins?

EMBED-Old Lady Terrified by Race Car Ride - Watch more free videos

HAAAAAAAA